Children’s Story: Who’s Afraid of the Big Bad Box?

Hello my little pepper,

Sorry for my repeated sneezes last night: they must have shook your little house quite a bit. Because you’ve been so good to Maman, I wanted to come up with a special little blog post for you this morning: I wrote you a little story. I inspired myself from Myla, your dog sister. You’re really going to love her — she’s SOOO fluffy and sweet, when she’s not a bitch being difficult. Anyway, here it is. I can’t wait to have you in my arms and read it to you. Oh you betcha there will be a puppet too!

There once was a wox named Myla who was the size of a couch. What is a wox? A wox is an animal that is part wolf and part fox. Yes, yes. What can I tell you about this wox except for its size, its name, and the sound of its bark? Well this wox was also very afraid of a box. You have to imagine a big ginger wox afraid of a simple box! It was like a couch being afraid of a simple pillow. “Big bad box!” she barked. “Big bad box,” she grumbled.
The first time she noticed the big bad box, she sniffed it, she poked it, she licked it, she scratched it, she wagged her tail against it…Whatever she did, the big bad box would not sniff back, poke back, lick back or wag its tail back. In fact, it shocked her to find out it had no tail! Days went by as the wox stared at the box, guarding her humans from the imminent attack from this unwelcome cardboard fiend.

She implored them to take away the big bad box. “Pat, pat”, they said. “Go lie down, Myla”, they repeated. She spent hours lying down on the floor staring at the box, waiting for it to make its move. Until one day, the smaller human that walked a little funny came and opened the top of the box and smiled. Myla rushed to her side to protect her. Then, the bigger and hairier human came and started pulling out wooden pieces and sticks out of the box. Myla rushed to his side to protect him. She stayed close by, watching for any sudden movement from the big bad box. She barked at it once as a warning, so it stayed put. But the hairy human kept working, mounting the wooden pieces and sticks together until it become…another box. This time, it was bigger, taller, and you could see the inside of it. “Big bad box!”, she barked through the bars. “Big bad box”, she grumbled. At least now the box was high enough she could sneak under it and keep watch in enemy territory.

Days went by again, and Myla kept watch from her post. She could always be found underneath the box, just waiting. Until one day, the humans came home with a little strange-smelling package wrapped in a blanket. They carefully put the package down inside the box. They unwrapped the blanket, and my oh my! It was a tiny little human! “Don’t go in there, tiny little human!” she barked and barked. She jumped up quickly to grab the top of the box with her front paws and whispered to the tiny human: “Keep away from the box.” But the bigger humans shushed her warnings and dragged her out of the room.

From that day on, Myla the ginger wox had a new mission: (when they are no squirrels to chase) protect the tiny human from the big bad box. She spent hours underneath the box, keeping watch. The humans finally learned to appreciate her soldier efforts and let her be. As it turned out, the tiny little human was a pretty impressive contender against the box, howling even louder than Myla could, day in and night out. Myla was proud. Against two, the box stood no chance.

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